emotional burst....

Whenever I say I am happily settled in my life something or other happens and everything breaks into pieces.  One time was bearable; two times Ok I have a bad luck but again!

Two years three friends lost, countless number of contacts broken (intentionally) I thought life was hard on me but now I think it’s me who is unacceptable.

As I scrip down on the keypads with my roommate snoring away in the corner at two in the morning to one in particular, I wanna express my feelings for them.

To all those lost relations and to the one I lost today…

I was naïve, dumb and shy,

For your grace. I have climbed this mountain,

As several highs and lows proved futile.

It’s your grace,

I am scribbling these lines on paper.

 I still remember how I used to dread The English literature.

Some say I am talented,

Some say I am a writer.

Little do they know, you are the reasons,

Behind every scene and picture.

image credits  here

I miss you all....

Mistakes...

In our exhausting hours when we close our eyes it’s mandatory a face or may be a memory will flash before our eyes, but the duration of its stay depends on our activities we do following that incident. 

We may choose to avoid it by engaging in some priority works in hand or in some cases the person may sit and give it a thought as to ‘why it happened.?’

There are some moments in life which you wish to delete forever, or wish it never happened it the first place. But how often life takes our wishes?? 

Sometimes it takes an auspicious turn; a wicked one, which strikes you completely offguard. And you fall with your face flat! A wicked one, indeed!

image credits   here

Having a special one on your side can prove a boon, but don’t make them go away because it’s then the problem starts. If the mistake proves to be large enough you will end up losing them forever. And how often we curse ourselves for the stupid things we once did and wish………….Ah, life never makes you amend those wrong decisions!

Disappointment is what is left behind. It’s better to take smart decisions than to cry over the wrong ones. Yes, there is the option of moving forward, but it seldom happens quickly. 

Here I would like to introduce a new word TIME. It heals the worst of scars.

Someday I laugh someday I cry,

Some strings are touched, some are left behind.

Some are wired, some hang outside.

Some emotions are confessed, some hide inside.

Words are few to describe you my feelings,

Some are strong; some lie weak in the stand.

Still, the regret of letting you pass cannot subside.

------X----

Musings of a drunken girl.

drunk she was,
uttering twaddle from the start.

.

abusing her roommate
with frustrated and disgusting tone,
threatening to kill her today.

.

With few days to go,
waiting zealous for her mate to arrive.
Dreaming about him everyday,
hugging, with her arms stretched wide.

" with a week with him !!
dude, I am already on cloud nine "

.

assuring me, our friendship
would survive, breathing heavily...
even if the situations are turned futile.

The vodka shots are weaving their sorcery,
for her voice, gradually losing its intensity.

.

" Of the roads ahead,
you would find a suitable match.
Perhaps, I would only be omitted,
for my innocence and left behind. "

.

Amending her tone, she continued...
"you do value our friendship
or else we won't be here discussing.
You are my favorite,
let this friendship last,
even if it had a wavy start."

.

P.S-  written after a friend of mine called me in a drunken condition and kept reminding me of our friendship.

कुछ अन्कही बातें.

.

सामने हो कर भी उनसे कुछ कह न पाए,

लफजो मे उलझे रहे, गुफतगु हम कर न पाए I

बेमतलब ही बूनतें रहे सपने हजारों

और अरमान चाहत के,

आलम जब आया सामने, ईज़हार हम कर न पाए II

.

एक टक देखते रहे उन्हे दूर से ….

और चेहरा उन्का निहारते रहे मन कि तस्वीर से I

शाम निकल गई इसी असमन्जस मे,

पर उन कतारो के आगे कभी बढ न पाए II

.

दिल कहता रहा उन्से बात कर…

अपनी चाहत कि गहराई अपने लफजो मे बया कर,

ये चिंगारी बूझ ना जाए रात ढलने से पहले

इन तारो को गवाह बना, तू अपनी मोहब्बत का ईज़हार कर… II

.

भीड़ मे भी नीगाहे बस उन् पर बनी रही,

लाल लीवाज की छाई आंखो पर पड़ी रही

मौके की तलाश मे यूही भटकता रहे

खड़े थे वो सामने हमारे और हम बस आँख मचलते रहे   II

.

सामने हो कर भी उनसे कुछ कह न पाए,

लफजो मे उलझे रहे, ईज़हार हम कर न पाए.....

.

वकत की गाज हम पर आ गिड़ी....,

महफील मे जब उन्की उपस्थिति न मीली I

कुछ कहते  उससे पहले ही वो चले गए,

अरमान चाहत के सब बेमतलब रह गए,

लगा दि देर हमने बहुत

और इंतजार वो कर न पाए III

.

.

----X----

a moment with you....

I saw her again, distant, beyond my reach, but close enough to remember her fragrance. Early in the morning, close enough to hear chuckle, feel her touch but not enough to leave an imprint.

A medium of channel beyond the towers and web of modern connections, which flows through one way and strong enough to shorten miles of distance in between.

At the end of which, it left old yet unforgettable chapters of love,showcasing slides in front of the eyes, beyond a click of the mouse, fresh enough to present every tiny detail and strong enough to shiver my soul from inside.

I wish I could have captured that glimpse, just like every other pic of her but it was too short to be captured and too weak to relive again.

All above it, I lived a moment with her, without her permission and beyond the curious eyes of the world. 

Far from restrictions and rules, yet close enough to get featured in my journal......

I miss you.

.